October 2009

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Slowly Socializing
First Friday
Well, October was more exciting than we thought it would be. It started out with what seemed like a typical month. We went with Erin and Nate to see the Pulitzer Prize photograph exhibit that was on loan at the UM...followed by dinner at the Depot Lounge. We had intended to go see more stuff that was available for First Friday Missoula but we were pooped after seeing 7 decades worth of moving photographs.
http://www.umt.edu/montanamuseum/Pulitzer.htm
http://firstfridaysmissoula.blogspot.com/

Lunch with Sylvia
I finally had lunch with my yoga instructor. It was lovely to talk with her outside the context of yoga. She shared a wonderful book on baby massage that she referred to when she had her children. What a lovely was to welcome me to motherhood. I just love the little gestures!

Montana Bars Went Smoke-Free
Yay!
http://missoulanews.bigskypress.com/missoula/last-drag/Content?oid=1168449

More Nesting
Stuff
We also continued to nest (thank goodness). We bought our first microwave oven and started stocking up on diapers and prepared foods. Christmas gifts were purchased and wrapped. Yes! So soon! But now I don't have to worry about it. As part of the nesting we frequented Target, Costco, and the Home Depot. Once, while we were at Target, MSU beat UM (a rare occurance) and Nichole suggested that it means our baby will bleed green. She texted this Spartan thought to Mike, which he promptly ignored.

The Bassinet Arrived
The bassinet that I slept in when my parents brought me home from the hospital arrived. (Alex, Nichole, and my cousins all slept in it as well so it is a true family heirloom. Thanks for sending it Aunt Harriet!) We received a note from USPS that a package needed to be picked up or delivery arranged. So on a Saturday morning we went to the post office and presented our slip. The looks on our faces must have been priceless because the wardrobe box surprised us. It was huge! Luckily, Oldsmobiles swallow a surprising amount of stuff and the bassinet fit right in the back seat.

A New Shower
We hired Justin the Tile Guy and Dennis at Miracle Method to renovate our bathroom shower. As things always seem to go, the project got delayed a few times. First, Justin had to delay his start because he was sick and then the plumber delayed his work because he got sick. Not such a huge deal unless you consider the fact that the delays happened to coincide with an early holiday package... (More on this later.)

Fall Color
Time accelerated to the end of the month. We had our first snow in town, which froze all the trees and stole our fall color. A week after the freeze, the weather was warm and Mike and I set aside an afternoon to take some pictures of my pregnant belly. We went to the Rattlesnake Wilderness area and walked a short hike to fields of golden grasses. During the entire afternoon we saw only one other person so it felt like an intimate afternoon. It was a special experience to have Mike shoot pictures of me. I never felt more beautiful or more loved in my life.

I continued to get compliments on my belly. I heard "You're so small!" as much as I heard "You're so big!" and "I love your belly. You look amazing!" How nice! I love getting compliments!

Friday (T-4)
I took the carseat to be installed and inspected by the fire department. I hadn't anticipated the 45 minutes of information and stuff but in the end I felt confident that I would know what to do with the baby for that one part of parenthood...using a carseat safely and correctly. Check.

Saturday (T-3)
Another shopping day.

Sunday (T-2) The October Potluck - An Informal Baby Shower
For the October potluck at the Jacobs house Teresa invited people to bring gifts for an informal baby shower. It was perfect! We each got a gift: Mike got beer, I got a gift certificate to a spa, and the baby got handmade baby art (a quilt to look at to make him smart). As usual, the evening was filled with good times and lots of laughter.

Monday (T-1)
The swine flu vaccination became available for pregnant women in Missoula. So I scooted over to where the health department was administering the drugs ASAP to ensure that I got the "good" kind.

Tuesday (Liftoff) - Birth Story
At 4:20AM I awoke to the release of the seal. Mike was up in a flash with me and we sat wondering if "this is it." An hour later my waters released and I started to tremble and thought, "this might really be happening today!" We called our doula and our doctor and were advised to go to the hospital to see what exactly was happening with my body. We considered leaving our hospital bag at home because we were in denial that we would be staying, but we figured it was packed so we should take it. Similarly, when we walked into the hospital we thought about leaving the bags in the car, but figured that it was easy enough to carry them in and out with us. By the time we left home I was having regular surges (contractions) about 20 minutes apart.

We checked in and they took my vitals and the baby's vital and since my blood pressure was high (I can't imagine why) they made me remain hooked up to the monitor while tests were run. We signed some release forms and handed our "Birth Plan" to our nurse, Linda. (See "A Brief Introduction" below for what we requested from the Community Medical staff for our care.) The tests came back affirmative: the baby was on his way! We were happy that we had brought our hospital bags! One very important thing was missing though...our camera! Luckily, Jen had accepted our nomination as our "point guard" in Missoula and she happily delivered the camera to the maternity ward for us.

My labor was pretty much what I expected and I managed the pain eyes closed with breathing, relaxation, listening to my yoga music, meditation, asking Mike to apply counterpressure to my lower back (the pain was as far as I could tell entirely back labor from Michael's position in the womb), and listening to Sandhano for guidance and confidence boosters when I got scared. The blood-curdling screams were from fright. When it came time to push (I had a clue because it felt like I had to poo) I announced as much to Sandhano, the medical staff measured how open I was and we all decided it was time to push during the contractions. At the start of pushing I screamed a few blood-curdling screams from fright as Michael descended.

I spent two hours pushing. First I was on my side, then on my hands and knees, and finally my doc suggested sitting upright because I wasn't progressing in the other positions. Sandhano stood at my left holding my leg up and back; Mike was on my left doing the same. Sandhano made sure I drank water and Mike kept a wet washcloth on my forehead. The nurses Linda and Carol kept the bottle full and the towel wet. I remember at some point I decided that I wouldn't let them put my legs down between contractions because it was too much energy for me to be lifting them up and down. I also remember listening to them talk about how they liked my necklace and how they would sing along to my music if they knew the words. (Sandhano gently let them know that it was my yoga music...which led to a discussion of who does yoga.) I remember wondering how bored they must be and marveled at their short attention spans...how long had they been watching me push? 5 minutes? Of course when I realized that it was 2 hours I understood better that they were indeed very patient. :)

Of course, pushing was very tiring but I remember when the perfect song came on. "Ong Namo Guru Dev Namo" means "I call on the divine wisdom" and at that moment I remembered my yoga practice. I meditated on moving my energy from my seventh chakra (at the top of my head) to my root chakra and heard my yoga teacher saying to observe my inner world and that I am strong. I also heard Mike next to me saying things like "wow" and "oh my goodness." With those things in mind, I continued to push and suddenly there was a ton of commotion and the baby was being put on my chest. The nurses were pulling my tank top down and ignoring my insistence to just cut it off. Evidently, it was too cute a top to "ruin" just to get the baby skin to skin faster. ;)

Despite that fact that Michael came out "sunny side up" (see more on this below), I managed to have a natural, drug-free labor and birthing experience. However, I had started to tear in four or five places so the doctor had to do an episiotomy to direct the tear. I remember her sounding a little frustrated while she stitched that she only does one per year. Even so, the nurses had a hard time finding the stitches afterwards because the doctor's work was so good. I also started to hemmorage and there was a flurry of nurses getting a pitocin drip started and who knows what else. They were frustrated on my behalf because I had a beautiful natural birth and then had to be medicated like crazy. I didn't mind. If medical intervention to keep me safe was the price I paid for having a natural birth then I was thrilled.

In the birth room, the baby got lots of skin to skin time with me and then with Mike. He had his first breast feeding and was a natural. After a while, we were all moved to a private postpartum room to be together to recover for a couple nights. They wanted to keep an eye on me because of the hemmorage and an eye on Michael because he had presented the largest part of his head and was a little bruised, which sometimes leads to abnormal jaundice.

That evening we made phone calls to our family to let them know of Michael's safe arrival. We also checked our voicemail and learned that the plumber and the Miracle method guy had left multiple messages for me saying that they could work on our shower if I could let them in. So, I called them back and "apologized" for not getting back to them sooner...I had a baby that day! They were both very excited for me and they coordinated their efforts to complete our project before we got home. It was so amazing that they showed us patience and excitement and work ethic! I highly recommend them to anyone who needs to have work done on their bathrooms...

On Wednesday the hospital gave us a "date" for lunch. Instead of just feeding me, they fed Mike too! We got a table cloth, cloth napkins, and fillet mignon meals. We ate it cold because we had been caught up in taking care of the baby for a couple hours after the meal had been delivered but it was a nice little way to celebrate together.

On Tuesday night and Wednesday night I marveled at how "easy" Michael was to manage...at least compared to the screamer next door. He was small and easy to handle and he was pretty quiet. He just would make a sweet little grunt and open his mouth really wide to indicate that he was hungry. Mike and I were so pumped up that we slept very little and spent many hours staring at our son. I remember feeling like the baby in the bassinet at the foot of my bed was WAY too far away from me and I decided to just snuggle with him most of the time we were in the hospital.

Over the course of our stay I stayed in the postpartum room to heal. (Walking wasn't all that easy.) So Mike accompanied Michael to the nursery for his tests. He would return to the room and give little reports about how Michael was measuring up. He also reported seeing the other new dads in the nursery and thought that all the babies were cute. One of the funniest things to me was when he came back and described a fluffy pink blanket that one of the other dads had for his daughter...his son was definitely in need of a fluffy blanket too!

Thursday afternoon we went home. Mike made a diaper run to get diapers that were small enough to fit our little premie. And that fluffy blanket Mike wanted for his son fell into the cart too.
Friday afternoon Mom and Dad U arrived.
Saturday was Halloween and instead of opening our door to germy little neighborhood kids, we left a basket of candy on the front porch. We turned the porchlight out and the kids had to brave the front and the sudden "on" of the motion light to earn their candy.

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A Brief Introduction

Who We Are

Our names are Julie and Michael Schneider. We have been very happily married for nearly nine years. We consider ourselves pretty laid-back but informed people. This is our first child and we are very excited about the entire experience. We have enjoyed the wonders of pregnancy and anticipate labor and birth to be an awe-inspiring milestone that marks both the birth of our son and our own “birth” into parenthood.

Hopes for Labor and Birth

To start, we would like to have a natural labor and birth – one with as few medical interventions as possible. We would like to try to manage labor pain without drugs and we would like to try to birth “naturally,” pushing spontaneously. However, we have chosen to have our son in Community Medical Hospital because we trust that if something goes wrong we will be attended to by medical professionals who are knowledgeable and caring.

Preferences for Our Baby

Immediately after our son arrives, we request one hour of togetherness during which we hope to have plenty of skin-skin time (baby with Julie and then with Mike) and our first breastfeeding. We will not give permission to vaccinate our son for Hep B. If there is a choice regarding circumcision, we prefer to have our son circumcised at a later date.

Our Visitors

We have brought Sandhano Dennison as our doula to provide us with undivided attention and labor support. We do not anticipate having any other family or friends visit us during our stay at Community Medical.

Final Note

We look forward to sharing this experience with you!

More on Being Sunny Side Up (from http://www.babyworld.co.uk/information/birth/assisted_delivery/positioning_baby_for_birth.asp)
"Some are occipito-posterior (OP) which means they are head down but with their spine against yours. An OP baby and mother will have to work harder in labour to have a vaginal birth, and labour is often longer and more painful while the baby tries to rotate to the anterior position. A common side-effect of OP labours is excruciating back pain, caused by the hard surface of the baby's skull pressing on the mother's lower back."

First Visitors
Mom and Dad U had planned to visit for a few days at the end of October on their way to AZ. None of us expected that their visit would include time with their first grandson when he was less than a week old. Since Michael was three weeks early, we were very lucky to have them here because Mike could go to work to give his students their one-on-one oral midterm exams during the first week of November while they stayed with me. They puttered around the house while I watched the baby.

Happy Birthday Michael!

Please welcome our son!

Favorite Advice

Favorite Baby Advice
Practice picking things up with your toes. You don't want to bonk the babies head by bending over. (Mike Weinberger)

Each phase of the babies life comes with good things and bad things. Try to ignore the bad things and focus on the good things because before you know it the baby will be in a new phase of development and wonder. (Laura Paterson)

Give yourself a couple weeks alone as a family before inviting guests to greet the baby. (Too many friends, medical professionals, and authors to name here.)

Favorite Pregnancy Advice
Plan to deliver in a hospital but take a doula with you. (Angie Williams)

You don't get to take drugs for your headaches or have an alcoholic beverage at the end of the day so let yourself eat that donut. (Author of "The Girlfriend's Guide to Pregnancy")